Life is better when your shift at work is over or when you finally get in bed after a pretty average day.
Hope you guys enjoyed my Alphabiography. :) It was originally for an assignment in my Creative Writing class… No one took the class seriously, but when I got this assignment, I wanted it to be good. And I felt like it’d be cool to share bits and pieces of me that you might not know! I love the idea of getting to know someone and all of the little details… So that was me putting myself out there a little bit!
Anyway… Summer. Ah. Elysa & I went to Florida and it was so so awesome. Got to go to Universal Studios and got to play with my cute cute cousins that I love so much!! Everything about that trip was just super awesome.
Other than that, I’ve just been working and hanging out. Summer doesn’t get too much more exciting from here…
To be honest with you, I’ve been struggling a little. Life is hard, and having to move to college and change my life doesn’t make it any easier (although maybe, it will).
With moving, everyone at home goes on with life as if everything is just the same, which it is. The universe has only shifted ever so slightly, it’s so minuscule they can hardly tell that one small person is missing from it. Oh yeah, Abbey’s gone? Their lives hardly change once you take me out of the picture, and that’s just how life is. It just keeps going on.
On the other hand, here am I… 100 miles away from home and my life is totally altered, so different from the norm that my family and friends are so effortlessly living in my absence. My life is forever going to be changed while back home me leaving has hardly made a dent.
People move on. And that’s okay. It’s this thing we call the Circle of Life: it just keeps going, whether you’re there for it or not. I’m not counting on all of my friends to keep in touch. They have their own lives to live and really, I think maybe they might be sad for a little bit when I leave, but they’ve got so much going on that they’ll just… MOVE ON. It’s okay.
But here we are, talking about our futures as if they’ll be connected forever. We talk as if we’ll never drift apart; frankly, we won’t allow that kind of talk. We have all these plans. We make jokes about forgetting, but only because we can’t take that reality seriously. We talk of possibility. We talk of change, of what will happen, of what we want and what we don’t want. We’re investing so much in each other, but once I’m gone is it really gonna last?
For your sake and for mine, I hope it does.
You wanna know what I wish would last? These moments we have left. I wish they would last forever. For all the reasons that makes my heart so full and almost happy, I wish so badly I could stay stuck in a moment from this summer: driving in the car, or watching the sunset, or being covered in a blanket while the rain pours.
Everything about this summer makes me nostalgic. I’m just preparing my goodbyes, and I hate that. I want to live in the moment and forget about college for 58 more days. But I can’t. It’s just me now. They’re just them. We’ll all do our own thing and we’ll grow apart (maybe) but that’s okay. Because there’s so much more waiting for us that we can’t even imagine.
“When we give up what’s most dear to us (but not as dear to us as Him), He will make up the difference… Let go. Let go of the things that don’t let us be happy.”
I heard this today in a talk in sacrament meeting. You know what I love most about that? Is that we can let go. Nothing is ultimately holding us back from our Savior. He is there with arms open wide, waiting for us to let go of what is tying us down, to be able to become free… The cool thing about the Atonement is that it isn’t just for repentance and forgiveness… that’s just a part of it. The Atonement is for ourselves in every aspect.
He can heal us.
Time can be one of our greatest friends…
But it is also our biggest enemy.
Should this be the last thing I see
I want you to know it’s enough for me
Cause all that you are
Is all that I’ll ever need
So in love
BYU is cool… Snow is cool… And decisions are HARD. My mom is my best friend and has the best advice for all of my silly problems. My prom dress is dark purple. And we ordered it online so cross your fingers it’s perfect!! Seminary assemblies are stressful when you’re in charge by the way… But it did go well sooo yay! I wish my pillow and I spent a little more time together. Josh is one of my favorite people to talk to. I am soooo grateful for him. Aaron & I went and got ice cream today. I’m wearing a cute flower skirt! Tenerife Sea by Ed Sheeran is a really pretty song. Nate & I are good dancers. I think. :) Jake is going to Washington D.C. on his mission!! Whoo! Crying is good every once in a while. I have work in an hour. Harry Potter is back in business! Funny how I read it around this time last year… I’ve been named SBO Campaign Manager for Aaron & Randy. haha I think Tanner Anderson is SO COOL. We’re friends! I really really don’t like math. I wish good days (and friends) lasted as long as photographs…. Deep, right?
So amid the conflict either great or small, do not be discouraged; God is over all. Count your many blessings; angels will attend, help and comfort give you to your journey’s end.
1. Rhett & Brooke are MARRIED. :) :) :)
2. Cameron, Connor, Leo, Carlos, and Charles all have their mission calls! It’s so exciting to see where these boys that I’ve known for years are headed… and I’m so proud!
3. Cadbury Eggs are perfect. Having a bad day? Eat them. Having a good day? Eat them. Your day is ten times better!
4. I really like it when people tell me to look up songs… and then when those songs are super great? Score.
5. Less than 85 days until I GRADUATE.
6. This week is halfway over.
7. I had a rough day yesterday until I went to work and closed with Aaron. He is awesome. AND Josh came and visited us for like an hour… kinda like he did a lot in the summer and it was cool. :)
8. I’m (mostly) caught up with homework and I’m so proud of myself! This accomplished feeling has been gone way too long.
9. Mrs. Hatch told me that I am a really good writer.
10. Josh is my tell-all-my-problems-to-friend. It’s a mutual thing–he tells me his problems too. I love it! Even though we complain a lot sometimes, it’s so great that we can let everything out to each other. He LISTENS to me. AND gives me advice (and comfort when needed). I love that.
11. I have the cutest little stuffed animal bear. He is the perfect cuddle buddy every night and I am so grateful for my cutest little stuffed animal bear. :)
12. I turned in my pictures for yearbook and I now have a good grade and I am sooooo relieved.
13. After this weekend I’ll be done with piano practicing. Whoo!
14. The way Rhett looks at Brooke.
15. Connor & I have become best friends and I love it so much. He’s cool. So are his friends! I love that they know me and like me!
16. Honestly, I’ve had the best days this month. The last two Saturdays were both sooooo perfect and fun.
17. Pictures make me happy.
18. Justin is a good friend to me. I’m grateful for all of Elysa’s friends and when they include me. It’s cool!
19. The Steadmans are all so wonderful and I love them so so much. They are the cutest family!
20. I’m going to prom with NATE. :) :)
21. I really do like meeting new people. Today I felt like I was ready and excited for college…
22. Fake it till you make it–it works. If you really try hard, it works.
23. I’m thankful for mutual. It’s like a breath of fresh air.
24. I LOVE NICE PEOPLE. *cough* Emma *cough*
25. Jake & Carlos hug me every time they see me. Jake is a tight hugger, and Carlos is a lift-me-up hugger. I LOVE IT. They are so fantastic and I’m so grateful that they’re my friends.
26. Favorite Girl by Icarus Account might just be the cutest song on earth.
27. I really love weddings I decided. Like a LOT. And the idea that someday it might be me in the white dress with some handsome boy who thinks I’m the prettiest girl in the world… Yeah. It’s a sweet thought.
28. God blessed the world with music… I’m grateful for music. Also, (this is wayyy off topic) when I pray for cute dreams, He gives me weird ones. It’s funny. ;)
29. When people tell me they like my clothes I feel really good. I know appearance shouldn’t matter too much, but it’s nice to know that I don’t look too terrible!
30. I’m grateful for my mom & dad and all they do for me. They give me chance after chance… kinda like Heavenly Father. And they love me like He does too… I am blessed.